


What motivates me? Hatred? Is it love?

by M1NTY



Category: Minecraft (Video Game)
Genre: Angst, Clay | Dream Angst (Video Blogging RPF), Clay | Dream-centric (Video Blogging RPF), Death, Ghost Clay | Dream (Video Blogging RPF), Hurt Clay | Dream (Video Blogging RPF), Hurt/Comfort, More tags will be added later on, Sad Clay | Dream (Video Blogging RPF), Suicidal Clay | Dream (Video Blogging RPF), Suicide, Trigger Warnings, Very badly mentioned dreamnotnap, dead..., dream regrets his actions, i don't even know if the ending would be considered happy since dream is kinda, i swear its there, its like mentioned once, no beta we die like george in manhunt
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-29
Updated: 2020-12-29
Packaged: 2021-03-10 23:42:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 844
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28395573
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/M1NTY/pseuds/M1NTY
Summary: Dream is dead.Or, dream is dead, he killed himself, becomes Ghostdream, but only remembers the bad memories. He thinks everyone hates him, and lives with despair 'n guilt, but still has that stupid smile on his face. He doesn't remember killing himself.So, they try to find Ghostdream...They find him where he was last seen alive.
Relationships: Clay | Dream & GeorgeNotFound & Sapnap (Video Blogging RPF), Clay | Dream & Sapnap (Video Blogging RPF), Clay | Dream & Toby Smith | Tubbo, Clay | Dream & TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF), Clay | Dream/GeorgeNotFound/Sapnap (Video Blogging RPF)
Comments: 39
Kudos: 933





	What motivates me? Hatred? Is it love?

**Author's Note:**

> Hi this was supposed to be up like, 2 weeks ago but motivation said no and,,, yeah. This'll have like, 2-3 chapters, I'm still thinking though. 
> 
> But yay, ghost dream
> 
> TW: s**cide

Equipping his maxed out Netherite Pickaxe, Dream slowly but steadily removed the obsidian walls from L'manburg. Layer after layer, his empty inventory turned into one with stacks of obsidian. 

The only other thing he had on him besides the pickaxe and obsidian was Tommy's discs. He would return them to the idiotic blonde before... leaving. 

Suddenly, he heard the sound of someone stepping in dirt and gravel. He looked down to see the 16 year old male. He looked... rather confused. Much more confused than before. "Dream? What the fuck are you doing?" He was on the other side of the wall, due to the green hooded man requesting him to follow him back the L'manburg. 

"Taking down the damn wall. What do you think?" Okay, now he was DEFINITELY confused. Tommy was exiled. Dream had the discs. He had the power. What was he trying to do? 

"Yeah, I can see. But why?" Dream ignored his question, and continued mining the blocks. Tommy was now screaming his name, which alerted the others. 

Tubbo, Quackity, Niki and Fundy stood on the L'manburg grounds as Dream finished getting rid of all the obsidian. His inventory now had stacks of it. He looked at Tommy, before giving him his discs back. 

He then threw a scroll at Tubbo, who caught it gracefully. Upon reading it, his face was in schock. "You're,,, unexiling Tommy?" Said man admired his discs again for a split second, before looking back at Dream, hearing what Tubbo said about the scroll. 

"... Big D?" Dream's heart cracked a little. 

"Tommy, tell George and Sapnap I love them." And with that... he was gone. 

__

Dream was what someone would call an admin. 

See, people such as himself could create worlds for others, so they could just chill and hang out with friends. 

What originally started out as a spot where Dream and George could check out the Nether update quickly into the Dream SMP. Then L'manburg was made after Tommy & Willbur joined. 

Dream could teleport places, as well as make codes for the world and have infinity lives. He could also go into 'creative mode,' although he never did that. 

He had all the power he wanted. He got his lands back, he got Tommy out of the way, he had the discs... So why did he feel so alone? 

Ah yes, because of that argument he had with George and Sapnap. 

He didn't *mean* any of the words he said. He loved them so very much. He only said that to feel Intimidating. He didn’t give a shit about the discs. No, he cared more about his boyfriends than the discs. He just wanted to feel in control again, because he knew that Tommy would always be better than him no matter what he did.

Oh well, that didn’t matter anymore. 

Being an admin, you had infinite lives. No matter how many times you died, you would always respawn as if you never died in the first place. People could kill you as many times as they’d like, and yet you’d still have all those lives left.

Dream looked at the mysterious potion he made. According to legends and myths, only the “withering soul” potion could kill an admin. What it did was attack the admin’s code system, getting rid of their lives and leaving them with only one left.

After weeks of experimenting, he finally made the soft purple, beautiful blue potion. Golden stars swirled inside it, which made it look like a galaxy. The void, even. Did he really want to do this, though? After getting what he wanted, did he really want to do this?

Yes. Yes he did.

Opening the cap on the bottle, he took a huge gulp of the potion, feeling the burn of it as it entered his mouth. He then smashed the bottle on the ground, wiping his mouth.

His insides hurt. A lot. It was the mixture attacking his code.

Slowly but steadily, he removed everything from his inventory, and in replacement, took out his Netherite Sword, Nightmare. Exiting his hidden house, he slowly made his way to the community house, aka the original Dream Team home.

He climbed the steps, before taking a seat on one of the tables. He smiled softly, pulling out the chat and writing something.

[Dream: thank you, everyone.]

He slowly picked up the Netherite Sword, before placing it at his neck. Part of him screamed to do it. To kill himself already. After all, isn’t that what everyone wanted? They wanted him gone. Dead. He caused so much damage to L’manburg, caused the citizens to get hurt and traumatized. He hurt his friends. He hurt the Dream Team. The people he promised he’d never leave.

“Do it,” his mind screamed at him. But another part said not to. That people cared about him, that he wasn’t some fuck-up.

No, he was indeed a fuck-up. No one could stop him. 

Closing his eyes, he pushed the sword into his neck, immediately killing him.

“Goodbye, Sapnap and George.”

__

**Author's Note:**

> I love cliffhangers
> 
> OH and if you didn't realize yet... Then the title is from the song 'Brutus - The buttress'
> 
> Also I changed the tags because I feel like this isn't necessarily Dreamnotnap,,, because, well, you know, ghost dream!!


End file.
